I really don’t know what to call this

Today I am heartbroken. Truly. There are no words adequate to express fully the feelings I have about what my country has just done to itself.

Here are the figures:

37.5% voted Leave, 34.7% voted Remain. 27.8% did not vote.

I sat up until three o’clock this morning, feeling any optimism I had dwindle away to nothing. I was woken at six this morning by multiple messages from friends who really only had one thing to say, which was ‘fuck’.

I am sad for everything we have lost, and I believe we have lost a lot.

Today feels like the beginning of the end of the world.

I really am waiting for someone to tell me that my pessimism is unfounded, someone who can say it with some certainty, someone who isn’t just saying it to make me, or them feel better.

Because I can’t see us coming back from this. Really I can’t.

I am so very, very sorry.

Today sterling has plunged to a low not seen for over thirty years.

Today we have lost £120 billion pounds on the stock market.

Today the government has had to pledge £250 billion to prop up the  banks who are tanking.

The two sectors hardest hit by the economic downturn are housing, so if you were hoping for social housing, forget it, and banking.

Your pound, at the moment, is worth about 80p.

Today Nigel Farage went on breakfast television, and announced that the £350 million pound a week claim was indeed a lie.

Nigel also said he could not spend the money he promised on the NHS.

He also said that he could not shut down borders.

But he did say that he would be working hard to relax gun laws, so that’s good.

We have already slipped down the economic rankings from the fifth largest trading power to the sixth, in one day, with a thirty percent drop in our figures meaning France overtakes us.

£100 billion has been wiped off of pension and ISA funds.

We are having our financial ratings stars, showing we are a stable, trading nation, taken away from us.

David Cameron has resigned, leaving us with a reasonable chance of a far right inclined Tory party leader running the UK should the Tory party manage to hold it together long enough to survive as our elected leaders.

Michael Gove, who told us that this country was bored of listening to expert opinions, has gone on record today to say that he and Boris will attempt to rebuild Britain with the help of the best experts he can find.

Leading Labour MPs have put a vote of no confidence in with regard to Jeremy Corbyn just to help things along.

Nicola Sturgeon has said that the Scots will be having another referendum because the Scots want to stay in the EU.

Sinn Fein are calling for a referendum to split Northern Ireland from the UK.

Spain are in talks already to get Gibraltar back.

And Boris and Gove are both back peddling on the need to invoke Article Fifty, supposedly the whole point of this, because without it we cannot split from Europe. It seems that they didn’t really want to leave Europe. They were just hoping to use this referendum to gain power in the Tory party.

In the meantime, the heads of the EU are demanding the the UK leave as quickly as possible.

And nobody has come up with a plan to navigate us out of this mess.

So if you voted out to save the NHS it’s not happening. If you voted out to stop immigration, it’s not happening. If you voted out to save the economy, well, let me know when we’re in the clear. Key leave players are already talking about going into the single market to save us, and they demand open borders and freedom of travel as a pre-requisite of joining. It costs the same as our EU entry and we have no veto. So what we are going towards is actually much worse than what we have left behind.

In local news, Cornwall, who voted in significant numbers to leave the EU despite being in receipt of millions of pounds of EU subsidies every year have been on national television this lunch time, because they want the government to guarantee their subsidies now.

And people being interviewed on the streets who voted leave are saying they’re terrified because they didn’t think we’d actually leave if they all voted leave.

Several people have posted on Facebook saying that those of us who voted remain have to accept that this referendum was a democratic process and that it’s time to stop getting upset. Instead we need to pull together and work for the common good. Just like we did in the general election.

I agree that this is democracy in action.

But I deplore the misinformation, lies and inflammatory hate speech that tipped the way some people chose to vote.  I feel that we have been playing at democracy with a rigged deck given to us by politicians who don’t give a shit about us as people, and that makes my heart sore.

And I ask you. How are we going pull together for the common good now? We are a divided nation and we have had our say. This is the result.

Unless there is another election, or referendum, or you choose to go grass roots campaigning, or protest marching, that’s it. You’ve done it. You have no more say over what happens next than anyone else.

Now, like everyone else you get to sit back and watch big businesses and politicians work over the consequences of your decision. We have one, dwindling country left. They’re already beginning to rip it apart.

How do we pull that together?


31 responses to “I really don’t know what to call this

  1. I am happy to accept the result (although I don’t believe in it), but I’m heartbroken by the amount of xenophobia I STILL see on my Facebook feed.

  2. Yes, in spades. And yes, fuck. Doomed, we’re all doomed. [Weeps]

  3. my family once had a foreign exchange student from peru live with us whose family had lived through a military coup — riots, economic disaster, international relations disaster, the whole thing. when we asked how the ordinary person on the street managed this, he said that no matter what, they mostly got up and went to work or school and tried to live their daily lives… i imagine that’s what will happen here. it just amazes me that the working or labour class voted so overwhelming through xenophobia and fear of losing the NHS and other benefits, when your own government has been the one depleting your available doctors and clinics and school budgets. i am so sorry, katy, for those of you with good sense and forward thinking minds. and children.

  4. Thank you Bonnie. xx

  5. Disappointed doesn’t even come close. Deeply saddened is barely adequate.
    The ‘remain’ voters are a HUGE minority and now effectively without a voice and all we can really do is watch the system as we know it unwind – and not in a good way.

    I voted ‘in’ for my children and their children and now what? I guess as your commentator says above the sun will continue to rise and to set but right now that is little consolation.

  6. Heartbroken as a heartbroken thing x

  7. You’ve made me cry….again 😥

  8. Oh God this is a depressing day….wtf have the leavers done? Scary times ahead for all…

  9. Juliet Hopkins

    A day that will go down in history as one of the worst for the UK this century. A referendum so fuelled by lies and misinformation it has led to Britain being destroyed as an economic power, a political power and even possibly a military power. Britain you are now weak and vulnerable and left in the hands of the far right wing. A very sad day!

  10. I have nothing new to add to the comments above, and indeed to your own post. I’m with you all, and if it’s any consolation, we’re all fucked together.

  11. watchingthewheels

    We are supposed to be moving back in September… I spent all of yesterday watching the polls and trying to stop myself watching the polls, and then getting furiously hopeful and then furiously bloody miserable. Fuck,fuck,fuck

  12. Thank you for taking the time to show your disillusionment, I feel it too and I felt totally shocked this morning aswell but wanted to send positive vibes by directing you to a chap called Chris Paradox on FB here https://www.facebook.com/Bthechangeagent who has much conscious ideals to share. He also recommended a book which I’ve also just bought but thought would help you with your destabalised feelings… Here’s a link for that here – http://charleseisenstein.net/project/the-more-beautiful-world-our-hearts-know-is-possible/
    Hope it helps… Stay strong and be positive… With Love ❤ x

  13. Agree with abso-fucking-lutely every word you wrote here.
    Haven’t dared to ask friends and family how they voted (I don’t really do FB) for fear of having to be very, very cross with them (aka telling them to fuck right off).

    I despair, I really do.

  14. You’ve managed to express just how I feel.

  15. I feel bereaved. I am grieving for the organisation that has protected me all my life. Every morning I wake up with that feeling you get in your stomach when you know that something terrible has happened but for a fraction of a second after you wake up, you don’t remember what it is. And then you remember.

  16. How are you this afternoon, after this morning’s obnoxious polemic by Farage to the MEP’s? I am so ashamed, so so fucking angry. And on top of all that I live in Cornwall. I cannot believe the stupidity of the people of Cornwall, just about the only county in the UK to receive net funding from the EU. The council now crying to a government we don’t have, asking for pledges to fund the roads, the university, the sixth form colleges, the small businesses… I am doubly ashamed – and I can’t even apply for an Irish passport!!!! (Don’t get me started on that one!). I feel we’re falling down a big black hole, fast – and that most of us are covering our eyes and pretending we can’t see it.

  17. Thank you for your posts. I’m so glad to have found your blog and its community of like-minded souls. I wonder if we’ll find a way of doing other than venting our anger and despair, of actually finding some meaningful way of working towards change? I feel a bit lost in all this so far. My sole contribution is to write to my Pro-Europe) Tory MP asking why no debate has taken place. Why is everyone in the House assuming it’s OK to proceed with Brexit on the basis of little better than a 50/50 split?

  18. Writing to Mps at the moment all we can really do unless we seriously try to put together some sort of legal action against them for lying to us.

  19. Hi Katy,
    I came across your “Happy now” post on Facebook yesterday and I think you put your point across very well. I’m German but used to live in England and my husband is British. He has just decided to come and live in Germany. We have been so worried since Friday! Not just for ourselves as a European family but also for our friends and family in the UK as we fear things are going to get really bad. Unless you’re rich, of course. And upper-class. But I don’t need to tell you, you have seen quite clearly through all the lies and deceit too.
    All the best,
    Meike x

  20. Jane Campbell

    For those who live near London there is a March in London for Remain in Europe supporters. The more we can get the better so we can stand and yel it was just an opinion poll. I am getting so sick and tired of the media claiming this huge victory. If I hear it one more time I will scream. They are fuelling a must leave mentality. It doesn’t calm the situation one bit. It stilll has to be voted on in the HoC. It is NOT law yet but they are talking as if we were already out of Europe. Heaven help the media even the BBC for the way they manipulate us. 37% of the total electorate voted to Leave, 36% of the total electorate voted to Remain. That is not a huge mandate. Many many referendum results have been put aside as not being carried on those numbers.. And given the lies, the deceit, the fact that neither Gove or Johnson really wanted to leave, the reality of the immigration, the uncertainty of the financial markets, the numbers of regrexiters, the closeness of the numbers, I really do no think this one should carry either.

  21. Jane Campbell

    The march is on this Saturday at 11am at Hyde Park Corner and marching down to Parliament Square.

  22. Fantastic. Thanks for this Jane. x

  23. Thank you for sharing – I feel the same anger and sense of betrayal. I mentally want to bitch slap the next person who says “let’s make Britain great again” aaaaagggghhhhhh!!!!!

  24. Thank you for sharing – I feel your anger and sense of betrayal. Is it wrong of me to mentally want to bitch slap the next person who says “let’s make Britain great again” aaaahhhhhggg! The Britain that existed a week ago seems to have disappeared- so sad,

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