I am experiencing something of a slump in mood at the moment. I expect it is 40% back pain and 50% being absolutely knackered. The other 10% is made up of a melange of stuff that either irritates me or depresses the life out of me.
In no particular order:
Gwyneth Paltrow’s GOOP. I know I don’t have to look, but every now and again I cannot resist a peek. Today, unduly influenced by Twitter mocking I looked at this recipe for Moon Dust smoothies and wanted to gouge my own eyes out with a fork. It doesn’t even have the comedy appeal of the whole steam cleaning your vagina episode. It’s just tragic, and expensive and shite. Moon Dust, ‘in a pig’s ear’ as my granny would say. I’m just hanging on in there for the Pixie Fart facials.
Donald Fucking Trump. Just a racist Oompa Loompa with the fate of the Western World resting in his sweaty, meaty paws. Nothing to see here, move along.
The fate of our GP surgery. We have done everything we can to save it. Now we wait. I bloody hate waiting. I’m more of a do or not do kind of girl. It’s all the Karate Kid with me. I am not temperamentally suited to sitting around while my fate is decided by other people. It irks me.
On a lesser note, I am troubled by the news that the Stone Roses will be releasing a third album after all this time. I am wondering if it will be any good. I am wondering if they can match up to the glory of their eponymous first album. I am wondering why I am worried by this at all.
Gideon George Osborne. May fire ants inhabit his underpants for eternity.
Call the Midwife is finished. Sister Evangelina is dead and I have to wait until Christmas to find out if Trixie gets a new boyfriend. How can I be expected to operate under this intolerable pressure?
My husband’s new interest in golf. He is trying to interest me in golf. It is not working. I am just not interested in golf. At all. Not even a teeny, weeny bit. Not now, not ever, not even for cake. That’s how not interested I am. It’s like me trying to get him to come along to see Hamlet. Not on my watch.
I could go on, but I have soup to see to. so I will leave it at that.
Remind me to tell you Tallulah’s hawk news tomorrow. It’s truly world of the bizarre.