And that’s how rumours start

We took Tilly to her friend’s house this morning. She is going for a sleep over and we will gather her to our bosoms again tomorrow.

On the way there we were listening to Badly Drawn Boy in the car.

Tilly said: ‘I really like Badly Drawn Boy, they’re excellent.’

I said: ‘It’s not a they, it’s a he. He looks a bit like Benny from Cross Roads.’

I don’t know why I added that bit. She has no more idea of Benny from Cross Roads than fly through the air, as we say in our house.

She said: ‘Gosh. I’m always doing that.’

I said: ‘Doing what?’

She said: ‘You know. Mixing up bands and solo artists. So I always think a solo artist is a band and a band is a solo artist.’

I said: ‘What? Like Bon Jovi?’

She said: ‘Exactly like Bon Jovi. I thought it was a he, and it is, I know, but it’s also a band.’

Tallulah piped up: ‘His name is Onjovi.’

I said: ‘It is not. It is Jon.’

Tallulah said: ‘Oh! I thought his name was Onjovi and his friend’s name began with a B and they added them together to make Bon Jovi.’

Tilly was snorting with laughter: ‘Onjovi Bonjovi.’

Tallulah: ‘No! Only his first name is Onjovi.’

Tilly: ‘Exactly. Mr. Onjovi Bonjovi.’

Tallulah: ‘No! No! You don’t understand…’

Tilly: ‘Who has a name like Onjovi anyway?’

Oscar shouted: ‘Daniel Radcliffe has red eyes all the time because he’s always in night clubs playing the bongos.’

Clearly he had nothing to add to the Bon Jovi debate but wanted to remain current.

Tilly got side tracked: ‘No! He doesn’t.’

Tallulah: ‘Yes he does. Mary sent me a picture of him in a nightclub playing bongos and that’s why he’s got red eyes because he’s up all night playing bongos when he should be asleep worrying about his next film.’

Oscar: ‘Yes. But it was very useful in the Deathly Hallows, because he had to have red eyes in that because he had to look sad and tired, so his bongo playing really helped.’

Tilly: ‘Daniel Radcliffe does not spend every night in night clubs playing bongos.’

Oscar and Tallulah: ‘Yes! He does!’

Oscar (thoughtfully): ‘Onjovi Bonjovi plays the bonjos.’

Tilly: ‘Yeah, and he has a restaurant where he only serves anchovies.’

Tallulah: ‘While he’s playing the bonjos. Daniel Radcliffe can’t come, because he just plays the bongos.’

Tilly: ‘At Onjovi Bonjovi’s restaurant which only serves anchovies all the customers have to put their money in an honesty box instead of paying a proper bill.’

Tallulah: ‘What’s an honesty box?’

Tilly: ‘A box with a hole for your money where you just put in what you think the thing you had was worth.’

Tallulah (snorts): ‘That is ridiculous.’

Oscar: ‘I’d only put in fifty pence for Onjovi Bonjovi.’

Tallulah: ‘I’d only put in five pence.’

Tilly: ‘That’s hardly fair. He worked hard on those anchovies, and he has to play the bonjos.’

Oscar: ‘I’m kinder than Tallulah. I’m nicer than Tallulah. Onjovi Bonjovi gets fifty pence from me, not five.’

Tallulah (scornfully): ‘Ha! Well he still only gets five pence from me because anchovies are disgusting and it serves him right for putting in an honesty box.’

Oscar: ‘And playing the bonjos.’

5 responses to “And that’s how rumours start

  1. Reading that I feel like a cartoon character with an exclamation mark over my head. Poor Jon..

  2. He’s had a hard life and he doesn’t even know it!

  3. LOL! a very entertaining conversation indeed

  4. I have to come out of hiding (and reading and thoroughly enjoying your blog) for this marvellous exchange. What wonderful conversations you have.

  5. We do have some excellent conversations, on an almost daily basis!

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