One star rating…

I am the type of mother whose children freely discuss all the happenings of a school day with.  I am led to understand that this is contrary to the normal operating procedure where the answer to: ‘What did you do today?’ is met with a grunt or a grunt followed by the word ‘nothing’, possibly encompassing a teenage style shrug.

Our daily journey from school is spent by the children telling me, in sometimes microscopic detail, what they did at school.  They vie with each other as  to who will tell me first.

This, as you can imagine, has its ups and downs. Some days it is a dull litany indeed. On other days it is a fertile bed of opportunity for entertaining me, as they exercise the curiosity and freedom of speech that does not necessarily come from being in a classroom setting.

Yesterday they were discussing religion.  I always find this fascinating.  Religion of any kind is so complex and can be so divisive it is never boring to hear them discuss things from their own, unique perspectives.

I have already tweeted bits of this conversation, so feel free to do other things if you’ve read this already. If I don’t write it down here though, I’ll lose it, and it’s just too good to lose.

Oscar said:

‘We have been talking about John the Baptist.’

I said:

‘He was an unlucky man.’


‘Yeah. He got his head cut off.’

Oscar, thoughtfully:

‘I don’t understand why John the Baptist had to baptise people in the river Jordan. Why didn’t he just use the bath?’

I explained.



He cannot get his head round a world in which baths do not exist. Surely this is some kind of madness?

Later he said:

‘When John the Baptist went into the desert he had to eat lotuses.’

I said:

‘No. Locusts.’

He asked me what they were. I explained they were like grasshoppers. I said:

‘Standard Biblical fare. Usually served with honey.’


‘John the Baptist really wasn’t very lucky, was he?’


‘No. He wasn’t…

Jesus went into the desert too.  He got tempted by the Devil.’


‘What did he tempt him with?’


‘Cream horns.’


‘Yeah. Stuffed with locusts.’


‘No wonder he said no.’


‘Yeah. He said ‘No thanks. Your restaurant isn’t very good. It didn’t get a good rating on Trip Advisor.’


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