Obi Wan

Last week, when Uncle Robber and I went to Sat Bains, we practised using Uncle Robber’s new Sat Nav machine.

It is a very handsome machine. Unlike mine, where I have lost all the important bits,  including the little suckery thing that sticks it to the window.  This means that when I am alone, I drive with it in my lap.  If I am driving in a fraught sort of way it appears that I sometimes clench my thighs together.  If I do this with the sat nav on my lap, it often slips between my thighs, and then, at the clenching point, I reset it in various different, and entirely unhelpful ways.

Not good.

Uncle Robber’s however, is state of the art.  It folds out of the front of his dashboard in a very space age way, and involves touch screen and other new fangled technologies of which I know nothing. Nothing at all.

All the way to Sat Bains, where we got hideously lost, despite the technical gloriosity of the Sat Nav, mainly due to the fact that the restaurant is on a dirt track under a hedge, and the rest due to the fact that Uncle Robber disagreed with it violently at every stage in the proceedings and started heading off across country in a free style and entirely manlike type way, I was bothered by the voice of the machine.

I knew I knew it, but I didn’t know where I knew it from.

If you know what I mean?

Anyway.

It nagged and nagged away at me, until we were on our homeward journey and I finally got it.

EUREKA.

The voice of Uncle Robber’s sat nav sounds exactly like Alec Guinness as Obi Wan Kenobi.

‘Turn left’

‘These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.’

‘Take the third exit.’

‘Feel the force, Luke.’

‘You have arrived at your destination.’

‘You can go about your business.’

Result!

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