When we were gallivanting about London Andrea and I saw a particularly impressive fish and chip shop. It was hot, neon pink and was called: ‘The Fishcotheque’! I love this. What an excellent name for a fish and chip shop. We were going to come back and take a picture of it, but were sucked down an interesting one way system shortly thereafter and never made it back there.
At one point I used to collect shop names, rather like other people spot steam trains. Here are a small sample of my favourites.
If you ever have the great good fortune to be on Ballard’s Lane near Finchley Central tube station, please take a moment to pay homage to ‘Cornelius Superhair’ hairdresser to the stars. I love this shop name so much I was of a mind to call Oscar Cornelius Superhair-Wheatley. Jason soon put a stop to that. I expect it is where all the superheroes get their hair cut, when they’re passing through Finchley Central obviously.
If you’re a man and you need a haircut your best bet for an exhilarating hair based experience is to go to ‘Jean Climax Barbers’ on Varley Road between Hendon and Colindale. It will probably be quite rude, but very satisfying.
There used to be a couple of fruit shops around Mill Hill in North West London with interesting names. By the look of it they no longer exist, which is a bit of a shame, but should you ever think of opening up a fruit based boutique please think long and hard about using: ‘World of Fruit’ and ‘Fruitopia’.
I was once travelling through Halifax in Yorkshire when I came across a hairdressers called ‘Hairport’. There are now lots of these it seems, including one closer to my home, over the border in Nottingham. I do look back on the Halifax based one with particular fondness because it was execrably bad it cheered me up for several days at the time.
My Dad and I were on holiday in Cyprus once when we saw a large sport’s shop called ‘Athlete’s Foot’. I made my dad take a photo of it I was so impressed. I believe there are actually more than one of these poorly named emporia. Hooray!
My dad tells me that there is a fish and chip shop near us called The Codfather. How lovely.
So, send in your names of shame for my collection and when we have a roll call I will read them all aloud at Cornelius Superhair.
There is a lady’s outfitter here in HK called Wanko. Would you want to go in?
Wife
I think you have beaten all my efforts hands down there. I am hoping that it translates into something lovely and poetic.
I see a van around for a local window company called Sashy and Sashy.
Bedding from Holy Sheet perhaps? Haberdashery from Jan’s Sew-Unique Boutique? And Althete’s Foot is alive and well Downunder too
Here are two that we saw last Easter in the Isle Wight:
A. Careless Solicitor
And my personal favourite:
Dave Death’s Motorcycles. When asking the locals who Dave is, they said: He’s dead.
There’s a dry cleaner’s in Kingston called “Mr Shirts”.
There used to be a local fish and chip shop called “a fish anda chip” the painted out the a’s a couple of years ago and added an ‘s’ to “chips”. We were very disappointed. We have Athlete’s Foot here. There is also a chain of hairdressers called “Hair Machine” and one called “Zinc – the essence of hair”. That last one tickles my fancy a great deal. I giggle every time I see it.
Alienne
Sashy and Sashy sounds a bit like a company Harry Enfield would invent!
Sharon
Holy Sheet is fantastic.
Homeofficemum
I love Dave Death. I think that is now my favourite ever.
Chantal
fantastic. I hope he’s changed his name by deed poll to match.
Ali
We used to have a local fish and chip shop called ‘The Fish Bar’ for years the F had dropped off and everyone local called it the ‘Ish’ bar. It got taken over a couple of years ago and they put the ‘f’ back, much to my distress.
I am a bit late with this but I just remembered that there’s a fish and chip ship in Belfast called “For Cod and Ulster”.
Hails
Better late than never. Great name too!